If we...

If with a bit of ink, a heart could be heard,

If with open ears, lines could be blurred,

If we let down our guards and stop building walls,

Maybe we’d be there to soften the falls.

We may never know how close they are to the edge,

But maybe through our investment we can build a hedge,

Because every soul is precious and just wants to be fed,

Truth and love to fight the lies that multiply in their head. 

Cut to the chase and see beyond the skin,

A kindred spirit may be lurking within,

So dig a little deeper and persistently mine,

Diamonds take work and are hard to find by design.

If we put down the paint that’s been making facades,

Maybe we’d be surprised, even if against all odds,

Every soul could be loved amidst the flaws,

Because though love is messy, it’s still a worthy cause.

Joy Lynn

A Teacher's Prayer (9/30/2012)

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You, firstly, for being my Teacher,
Being a perfect example of the grace and patience one will need,
To feed Your children with knowledge,
While disciplining to keep the peace.

I do not do my job perfectly,
But every day I pray I’ll be,
A good example to my students,
Of a life consecrated to Thee.

I laugh, I cry, I get frustrated too,
Lord, I simply don’t know how You do what You do.
How do You feel when a child looks in Your eyes and lies to Your face?
Oh, I imagine I’d feel much disgrace…yet You give more grace.

Help me love these students You have entrusted to me.
Help me to point them to You and remind me to bend the knee…
Because I cannot change their hearts, and I cannot give what they need,
But for Your work in their heart and in mine, I humbly plea.

Amen.


Joy Lynn

A Journey by Foot (pictures included)

Many of you know that I had foot surgery back on June 26th to remove several plantar warts from my heel.  Some may be curious to see a few pictures pre and post surgery but don't want to ask, so this is how I have decided to share them as I don't want to scar anybody by simply posting it on facebook without the possibility of it being unseen.  It's not terribly gruesome I think.  I will post three pictures with plenty of space between so you can stop where you'd like.

The first one will be a few days prior to surgery.  Over months, one wart turned into a dozen but up until I saw a podiatrist early in June, I simply thought I had one wart and a huge callus building around it.  Silly me....hence the need to take care of the warts quickly as they were spreading rapidly.  

The second one will be what it looks like now so you can see how much it's healed up in the last month and change.  The new skin still feels tender but I am also trying not to baby it too much.  The last of the open wound drainage finished Wednesday, July 29th so it took a while for that skin to form completely.  Since then, I've gone down from lots of bandage and padding to nothing at all on my foot.  We'll see what my doctor thinks of that tomorrow...  :-X

The last picture will be of my foot the day after surgery.  It is the most gruesome of them all so I am saving it for last so you can skip it if you don't want to see.  I find it interesting to look at though because it's crazy to know how much that part of my heel has healed over time.  God is good and restorative in both physical aspects as well as spiritual ones.  Anyway here we go.....

June 19th, 2015

August 3rd, 2015

That white speck in what I call the "dime" is just the glare from the light, so no worries there.  

Lastly, June 27th, 2015, the day after surgery and the first time I had seen my foot.

So yeah, that's three time period snap shots of the journey so far.  I took a picture almost every day since surgery and that's fun to flip through and see how much it's changed and healed day by day.  

I can walk normally on it though the more I walk in a day, the more it feels tender over time.  I can run short distances on it but I haven't tested it with lengthier adventures just because I am not sure what I would do if that fragile layer of skin tore.  But day by day, it's getting better, the future is looking brighter and school is moving every closer....so I better get  back in gear!  

Thanks for those who prayed me through the journey!  I appreciate you muchly!  

Until next time,

Joy

Martha, Martha, Martha…..oh wait, wrong show…

When it comes to relatable people in the Bible, Martha is my kindred spirit.  Now I am may not be quite the homemaker or as practically hospitable as she was, but I definitely find worth in service and doing instead of being.

I don’t “be” well.  There are many things you could tell me about who you say I am, that I would never believe for a second.  But I will take your compliments for what I do because I can see tangible evidence.  It’s much easier for me to accept credit to the concrete rather than to the transient. 

Oh boy, that last sentence sure sounded self righteous didn’t it?  A whole lot of self dependence going on right here…  God’s Word says that “without faith it’s impossible to please God” (Hebrews 11:6) yet so often, I am not acting in faith of Him but instead presenting my service to Him.  Faith and works are a delicate balance with the biggest role being played by motivations of who we seek to please and also who we are depending on in the process.

Service and work is not innately bad and I imagine Martha wasn’t meaning ill will when she was laboring hard in the kitchen while Jesus visited in the living room.  It’s not that she didn’t care about her honored guest…..it was likely quite the opposite.  She *did* because that’s what *loving* looked like for her.  She saw a need in feeding the guest and was determined she must fill it or heavens, the people may go hungry.  She hoped that her service to Him would please Him, whether He asked for it or not.

There are a lot of people out there doing good things for God and sacrificing whole heartedly in hopes of it pleasing Him.  And hey, it totally may be pleasing to Him so if that’s what God is calling you to, do it with your whole heart.  But I do know that I am often guilty of serving God more than I am worshiping Him….that I do more for Him than with Him.

 This revelation explains a lot of the struggles I have had recently concerning my intended plans for the summer.  A week ago I had to have surgery on my foot and the timing of the surgery ruined my well intentioned plans to serve at camp.  I love camp and have been pleased that for eight years, I have been able to participate in some way in the ministries of CEF and serve God in that capacity.  It broke my heart to have to call camp and tell them I would have to pull out of being part of CYIA and Week 1 because for one, I love the people and the ministry there, but for two, I thought I was letting them down.  That with a man down, they would be scrambling and that they had somehow lost out because I would not be present.

It was quite the opposite.  They were overstaffed and the girls’ side was just kind of overflowing, so my absence was a non-issue if not a bit of a relief.  When I learned all that, sitting here on my recliner with my foot kicked up, I felt like I had been handed a big slice of humble pie.  They didn’t need me at all.  I know they would welcome me and were sad to hear that I couldn’t make it, but I wasn’t a necessity.  The show still went on, because though I wasn’t there, God was and He went to work in a mighty way.

Because I couldn’t’ be at camp, I resolved to pray whole heartedly for the ministry there and kept in touch with a handful on campus to learn of progress made and praised God with them.  Though I wish I could have seen it with my own eyes and experienced it myself, it was so sweet to hear how God was working there.

Through many discussions I had with God this week about my current state, it’s been neat to see how He has worked here too.  He took me out of the kitchen and laid me up so that I could remember it is all about Him.  He can work without me just fine….but that said, He also seeks to work in and through me.  He just wants it to be out of a right relationship and dependency on Him and not myself.  When I trust Him with my whole heart and follow His lead, the pleasing Him runs in the same vein. 

Until next time,

In Christ,

Joy Lynn

Security Blanket

I can remember back to a specific time in 2010.  I was at Christian Youth in Action and I had just finished my year of bible school and the camp director asked me to share something at the CYIA closing ceremony along with two other people.  I stood up there and talked about how after going to university and getting a teaching degree, I realized I loved teaching and though my students succeeded at standardized testing, it was making little eternal impact.  After a year of Bible school, I realized how I wanted to take teaching and use it in a setting where I could also speak from a Biblical worldview, model that as best as I could, and invite students to have the same relationship with God that I had.  The part that still sticks out to me clear as day though, was towards the end of my little sh-peel, I said “my goal had always been the American dream, graduate high school, go to college, get a job, be financially secure, retire and then die….and though I was on that path, I was discontented in that it would only serve myself so I wanted to choose a different path and sought to work in ministry where I’d get to do what I love, and though I may not get paid a ton and be able to save a ton, the opportunity to change lives for eternity would be abundant.  Sounds lovely dovey, don’t it?

Then a year later, I got my chance to put it all into practice.  Got a full time ministry job that didn’t pay a ton comparatively to the same job in the public schools but had lots of opportunity to dig and pour into students here in New Hampshire and I have loved it.  But guess what also happened along the way?  I still held on to that need to be financially secure.  In the last four years, I’ve saved every penny I could and heaped it into a pile (or technically account) that I call my “emergency fund”…..yes, I did take Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University back in 2009, so there…  That emergency fund is there in case of emergency…..saving for a rainy day because you never know what will come your way.  I spent most of the last six months teaching my Economic students that….it’s important to save because you never know when it’ll rain and sometimes when it rains it pours so it’s important to have your ducks in a row then, then have to scramble and feel your way out of the peril of debt.

And then the rains came…..

A few things have piled right into my lap that are huge monetary expenses.  Theoretically, yes, some of them I could work out to get on a payment plan to not have such a hard hit at first, but then I pay interest and then I’d be in debt and the only INTEREST I have is to NOT be in debt… 

But boy, to see the money flying out of my account makes my tummy churn and heart hurt.  I saved that money for a rainy day and then when the rains came and started to wash the money away, it felt like the foundation under me was being swept away too. 

I’ve been independent for so long, that it’s hard to see it go away because what if the rain keeps coming and it all goes away…what then?  It took years to save this and imagining it all being gone just takes my breath away.

And then I think of my friends who live pay check to pay check and leap from God-thing to God-thing….. I am always amazed at my friends faithfulness to God through those unknown times and in awe of the numerous way God provides in each situation moving them along from base to base and never abandoning them.

So why can’t I trust?  Is it because I’ve always had so there was no want or need to trust solely on Him?  Have I grown so self-reliant that it will take a full on tsunami to tear me down to the roots and start again only trusting in Him? 

I hope not….but what if He does anyway?  Will I be able to say as Job (1:21) said, ““Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I shall return there.  The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.  Blessed be the name of the Lord”? 

Maybe as much as I want to fight it, the security blanket must be ripped away so that I fully grasp that only in Him am I secure at all.  Maybe He wont…..but maybe He will.  I pray that no matter the outcome, my heart will continually say, Blessed be the name of the Lord.

Until next time,

In Christ,

Joy Lynn

Surrender

Sometimes you’ve just got to give up, give in,

Let surrender begin.

You’ve hit a fender, life’s in a blender,

Best to just simply surrender.

Stop fighting for rights and turn out the lights,

You’ve fallen from seemingly new heights.

Rock bottom is cold, no longer feeling so bold,

But at least this solid foundation will hold.

Look up and see, there’s no reason to flee,

You just want to be set free.

Reach out your hand and then take a stand,

Seek the only One who can truly understand.

You’re not alone, even in this combat zone,

Surrender and His grace will surely be shown.

Give up the fight that is fueled solely by spite,

Know that He sees you in your plight.

Surrender my dear, there’s no need to fear,

Know that He’s working even if it isn’t clear.

I know the road looks hard and you are standing firm at guard,

But know that I reach out with the sincerest regard.

But above all, seek God, as I know I am flawed,

But by Him, I am always utterly awed.

I love you, sweet friend, and I trust your heart, He’ll mend,

And I pray that on Him alone should you depend.

Joy Lynn

Longing for Connection

She sits at the screen just passing time,

Consciously listening for that familiar chime.

Minute by minute, scroll after scroll,

New information is gathered but she feels like a troll.

Waiting for someone to just break through,

A new notification or a message out of the blue.

She sighs and she waits for a sign that someone cares,

The silence in her mind is more than she can bear. 

She’s looking for love in all the wrong places,

Twitter, Facebook and even MySpace’s. 

A connection with someone brings validation,

But a silent day causes self deflation.

So where should she go when she feels all alone?

Messages go unread and no one answers the phone?

Turn to the One who will never let go. 

Hebrews 13:5 says He’ll be there, you know?

So turn off the computer and silence your phone,

Find yourself on your knees and before His throne,

Give Him your troubles, your worries, your fears,

Lay down your burdens, He’ll carry those tears.

Return to the One who loved you first,

Who has loved you in your best and your worst.

Find acceptance and love in His tender care,

When you long for connection, you can find it in prayer.

Joy Lynn

New Year Souvenir's are...

...done for now.  Mostly because the new year is no longer new and I think the list accomplished it's purpose in opening doors to memory making and starting/encouraging new habits some of which have done well and others that haven't.  But I no longer plan to bore you with the run down of it.

That said, I did want to end the list on a high note because the biggest thing on the list was accomplished within the month.

I went to Texas for the first time since November 2012, so almost 2.5 years!  I missed it and it was so good to be back and catch up with family and friends there.  I was able to eat some delicious food, take some drives to admire how green everything was and how much the area had grown and I was also able to do a lot of sorting, packing and weeding out of my stuff.  I now have, if I remember correctly, six totes and two paintings left back home that I will eventually find a way to move up here if this is where I continues to reside.
I'm not a great or motivated picture taker but I'll let them tell some of the story and then wrap this one up and call it a souvenir list done well.

 This is the boat I got to sail around while in Texas. I simply called it the "boat".  The huge engine in this thing purred at higher speeds but it was a monster to try to park anywhere.

 My only home cooked meal of the trip, "bok choy" but got to have it twice so I was pleased.

 A wall decoration at the church that I liked.

 Whataburger is now in H-E-B, a Texas based grocery store, selling "fries" in a bag. It was interesting...  Not like a regridgerated bag but a potato chip bag, similar to potato sticks in a can.

 Texadelphia is still my favorite restaurant of all time.  Great sandwhich (it's actually a whole sub but I didn't think to take a picture til I was half way through my meal) that comes with chips and salsa and queso. SCORE!

 Palm tress because.....Texas............seriously, they are everywhere.  There is no where in the Valley that you can't see at least one palm tree on the horizon if you look all the way around.  Eeeeevvvveeerrryyyywhere!

 The fun of sorting.  Some old pictures ( Grandma, Mom and I.), an old gift to my mom, and part of my trading card collection.  I was that kid....

Taco Ole was my second favorite restaurant of this visit.  I got so full on chips and salsa and sweet tea though, that I had to eat most of my nachos as breakfast the next morning.

 Taco Fiesta also provided a solid serving of nachos and chips and salsa.  I love my Mexican food.

And last but not least, this is a picture of a brand-spanking-new Wal-Mart built in my hometown of Donna, Texas, population ~16,000.  My New Englanders are going to think that's a decent population to support a Wal-Mart but what you have to understand is there is a Wal-Mart in Alamo, six miles away, one in Weslaco, 3.4 miles away, and then a new type of Wal-Mart called a "Neighborhood Market-Walmart" that is 5.2 miles away if all you are looking for are the groceries.  That's further compounded by the fact that there is at least one H-E-B in every town as well, pretty much.  

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So some take aways from my time in Texas....everything is bigger there.  I had grown accostomed to things here in New England and they no longer felt small but then I went back to Texas and everything was HUGE.  I don't think we need big things here in New England but there are some stark differences between life here and there.  I'm glad I don't have to deal with the traffic, especially in McAllen when transitioning between expressway and frontage road.  I learned that a huge boat of a truck feels great going 70mph on the highway which is the speed limit down there.  

Most of all though, I learned that no matter the distance, family and friends will always be near and dear.  I am grateful for the time I was able to spend with each of you as some allowed me to stay in their homes, gave me rides, took me out to eat or talked over coffee.  It was a blast and a blessing to get to see the ones I did and hopefully next time I go down, it'll be a tad longer so I can see more people and relax some.

And for those not in Texas but praying, thank you for that!  If you are bummed the list follow up is ending, feel free to shoot me a message and ask how life is going and I'll surely update you.  Hope you enjoyed the pictures of Texas.  Sorry, not sorry, that there are no pictures of me in there, besides of when I was a child.  I'm not the biggest fan of the other side of the camera lens.  

Hope y'all are doing well!  Take care and God bless!

Until next time,

Joy Lynn

Why I Teach History

History is made by daily decisions.  One choice leads to another which paves a road you’ll call life.

Think of just the last 100 years.  Countries desire to be the best along with militant friendships led to World War I.  The rage over the punishments under the Treaty of Versailles fueled Nazi Germany and led to World War II.  The Yalta Conference meeting between Roosevelt, Churchill, and Stalin would pave the way to situating the Soviet Union as a world power and lead to its the eventual  takeover of most of Eastern Europe.  Broken promises led to the separation of an entire continent and a 40+ year period of tension, anxiety and inconclusive conflict in several countries throughout the world. 

Like a book, one chapter leads to the next, and though individually, we may have little say in what the country or the world does, we do still have a voice to make and tell our own story.  Tis our choice and responsibility.

Just this week, my Economics class asked why I was teaching about the national debt.  It is so huge ($18 trillion… $18,000,000,000,000), impossible to overcome, and what can I/we do about it anyway? 

To answer that question, I teach it because the debt situation we are in is a stepping stone in history…one that hasn’t been fully realized yet, though we have seen the signs (recession and housing crash of 2007-2008).  Eventually the country will have to make hard decisions about the debt and really set their minds to cut spending and/or collecting more taxes and both choices are not popular to the general public.  In Greece, when spending was cut to relieve their debt crisis, the people revolted through nationwide strikes, violent and sometimes deadly riots and torching banks.  Will that be our nation’s next chapter as well?  I teach because we are making history and if we do not look ahead, we will continue to fall behind in our own ignorance.

So what can you do about it?  

1. Pray for our leaders.  1 Timothy 2:1-2 says “First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way.”  
2. Choose to be a leader yourself, taking a position of government/political authority or campaigning and speaking out for what you believe.  
3. But most of all, I want to challenge you to take up the pen of your life and be ever aware of the choices you are making and how they pave the path of your life.  Know that the friends you make and the jobs you take will play a part in your story as a whole.  Know that you can learn from others mistakes and though you may not be able to solve the U.S. debt crisis, you are solely responsible for your own wealth and potential debt crisis.  

You may not be known in U.S. History but it is, at current, a mystery to how your history will touch the lives of those around you.

“Few will have the greatness to bend history itself; but each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the total; of all these acts will be written the history of this generation.”  -Robert Kennedy

As a Christ follower, I like to take note of how His Story changed not only human history in paving the way to right relationship with God but also how His Story has impacted me personally.  I pray that as I write my story, the choices I make will reflect Him and that He gets all the glory.

So…what will be your story?  That is for you to decide.

Until next time,

In Christ,

Joy Lynn

March 2015 Souvenirs

I made a list at the start of the year to focus on five goals that I knew would bring memories to tuck away as souvenirs when I think about this year.  March is here and I rocked it...ish!

A. Shop Local

I started off the  month purchasing an array of candy from the New Hampshire Old Country Store in Moultonborough, NH on my way back from Maine, so not really local to me, but locally owned there and some great candy!  As far as local restaurants, I hit up New Socials burger night once and Big Fatty's BBQ in White River Junction, VT twice.  Superb restaurants!

On one particular Saturday this month, I went local crazy though and spent like $25.  I first went to Violet's Book Store to see my friend, Tim, who was hosting a book signing there, so I picked up a signed copy of his book as well as a book from the store.  I then headed to the Spice and Dry Goods store and bought some spices.  Then I went to a store that was closing and picked up two heavy duty plastic display trays for a buck a piece.  Then to a coffee shop (frozen coffee) and a Greek restaurant for some baklava.  Super and delicious success!


B. Household hop--At least three stops per month in someone else's house.
7 households this month but most were only one stop this month, which isn't a bad thing but starkly different from last month.  It was fun to get around and visit with people in their households.  Thankful for the hospitality of friends!

C. Legit meal--Once a week
Er....the reason I put this goal was because it was something to shoot for.  I'd say I nailed this 2 out of the four weeks this month, so progress but imperfect progress.  On a slightly related topic, this week I bought pork thinking it was beef and was a tad horrified when I was cooking it like beef and went to flip it over and it was white and not a seared brown.  It wasn't a failed experiment though...just an unexpected one.

D. Trip to Texas
So in less than a month now, Lord willing, I will be in Texas!  I haven't been in the state since 2012 so it's been a long time coming!  I'm pretty stoked and getting excited about seeing family and friends.  Also kind of excited to go through more of my stuff and sort it out to bring some treasures back with me.  But pretty close to the top of things I'm most excited about is food.  I'm a little bummed that I won't have enough time for it actually.  If all goes to schedule, I am scheduled to arrive at the airport near home at 12:11pm on Tuesday, which puts me just in time for lunch (yippie!!!).  I am scheduled to depart at 8am on Saturday (slightly bummed because my original booking was for the afternoon but they recently emailed me letting me know they changed my itinerary).  So that puts me home only 3.75 days (wow, that was the first time I did the math for that, and it's sort of depressing now as my original plan had me not leaving til 4pm....8 hours home taken away so fast...sad day).

Well, in order to pump myself back up, let me list for you my wish list of restaurants that I want to go to in my 3.75 days there!
1) Texadelphia (number 1 for sure...my fave!!!)
2) A tacqueria to order "tres bistek tacos con maize".
3) Whataburger....if all else fails, this will be my Saturday morning pre-airport breakfast...gotta love 24 hours a day serving burgers all that time...."I'll take a whataburger with bacon and jalepenos on the side."  For those of you that don't know, I don't want them on the side because I'm chicken...they seriously give you more jalepenos in the cup on the side than on the burger if you order it with jalepenos on it.  I'll take 10 slices over the 4 they put on the burger anyday!
4)  Chick-fil-A, this is a fave but near the bottom because if it didn't work out while I was home, I can always trek over to Nashua here and eat there if I was desperate.

So to be honest, I grew up eating out a ton which I don't do as much these days but when I think of Texas food, I often think of my favorite restaurants so that's kind of where my heart is at there. That said, I have an aunt that I will see who makes some of my favorite dishes too, so if she happens to read this, which I believe she will, I hereby request "bok choy" or the Tahitian haystack meal.  :-D  No pressure though.

Excited to see and visit with those I get to see.  Man, it's going to be a whirlwind...what was I thinking....?  Well, just a good reminder to soak up every minute of fellowship and every ray of sun I get.

E. Read more
Reading has been a weak spot but once again, that's why it's on this list.  Motivation!  I finished re-reading "How an Economy Grows and Why it Crashes" by Irwin and Peter Schiff.  I have also started but not gotten extremely far into "The Candy Bombers" by Andrei Cherny so that's next on my list to knock out hopefully.

Beyond this list, March was pretty monumental to me personally in almost pushing a reset button on my life and the track I was on.  I thank God for the people and events/situations He used to wake up the sleeping giant and get me on a better path.  It's been a good month of learning, growing, praying and stretching.  Thanks for those who have come along for the ride.  I hope your March has you marching triumphantly and looking forward to Spring!

See you next time!
Joy Lynn

**Speaking of next time, April's run down and probably a recap of Texas in general will have to wait until early May as I'll still be in Texas as the calendar month flips so just a heads up there.