With the Closing of a Chapter- A Brand New Scene for You and for Me

It’s been a while since you crossed my mind,

I used to think about you all the time,

Imagine what could have been,

Before that chapter hit an abrupt end. 

We talked for hours,

Shared our hearts,

Imagined what life would be like

If we lived closer rather than apart.

Then it came to fruition,

What a transition.

But I gave you the cold shoulder and dragged my feet

That summer ended in total defeat. 

It’s no wonder you quickly moved on,

She was ready and I was not,

So came the end of our song,

But the beat still goes on...

Because ultimately the closing of that chapter,

Led to the writing of something new,

A bold new path,

For me and for you. 

So it wasn’t meant to be,

And though I sometimes wonder if I missed my chance,

You probably look back and see,

That the end of that chapter was the transitioning scene to your fulfilling romance. 

With every closing of a chapter,

God’s in it still,

To lead and to guide,

And to do His will. 

So may I not regret and question the past,

For it’s led me to paths I never dreamed,

And though it didn’t go as I had once imagined,

It is still a story in which God continues to guide and redeem. 

Joy

Spoken Word- Why Do I Do What I Do?

((I don't particularly love my voice, but this piece begged to be spoken word so I went with it...it's still a battle raging and this is still the prayer of my heart...))

God…
Why do I do what I do?
Certainly not for the pay…
Not fortune nor fame…
I’d like to think I do it,
To glorify Your name.

But I know I’m failing,
Pretty epically..
For my motivation is twisted
My eyes are set on me.
In this battle I’m losing
But I’m longing to be free…

Free of insecurity,
Free of expectation,
Free to let Your work be done
Without stipulation.
Humbly loving and planting seeds
And fleeing temptation…

Temptation to let the lows dictate my days,
Temptation to let emotions order my ways,
Temptation to grade my failures or success
On how many students pass or fail a test,
Or how many didn’t do their homework like the rest,
Or how many like me the best.

So bring me back
To the reason I’m here
I didn’t come all this way
To let depression and fear
Be the center of my life
And ruin my career.

I came to be a light
Reflecting Thee
To students who often
Remind me of a teenage me
Wandering through life
But lacking to see...

To see a life of faith lived out
Vulnerable and raw
Not without mistakes
Yet He catches every fall
Broken yet beautiful this walk
For He always hears us when we call.

So fix my eyes on You now
Help me to clearly see,
Help me to hear Your voice
Over the whispers of the enemy,
And draw these students to Yourself,
This I humbly plea.

-Joy Lynn

Why do I do what I do?

God…

Why do I do what I do?

Certainly not for the pay…

Not fortune nor fame…

I’d like to think I do it,

To glorify Your name.

But I know I’m failing,

Pretty epically...

For my motivation is twisted

My eyes are set on me.

In this battle I’m losing

But I’m longing to be free…

Free of insecurity,

Free of expectation,

Free to let Your work be done

Without stipulation.

Humbly loving and planting seeds

And fleeing temptation…

Temptation to let the lows dictate my days,

Temptation to let emotions order my ways,

Temptation to grade my failures or success

On how many students pass or fail a test,

Or how many didn’t do their homework like the rest,

Or how many like me the best.

So bring me back

To the reason I’m here

I didn’t come all this way

To let depression and fear

Be the center of my life

And ruin my career.

I came to be a light

Reflecting Thee

To students who often

Remind me of the teenage me

Wandering through life

But lacking to see..

To see a life of faith lived out

Vulnerable and raw

Not without mistakes

Yet He catches every fall

Broken yet beautiful this walk

For He always hears us when we call. 

So fix my eyes on You now

Help me to clearly see

Help me to hear Your voice

Over the whispers of the enemy

And draw these students to Yourself

This I humbly plea.

Until next time,

In Christ,

Joy Lynnn

Forgiveness (October 20, 2017)

Forgiveness: A topic that I have been having on-going conversations with my students about. This was birthed out of the theme God has firmly pressed on my heart lately. 

Forgiveness (October 20, 2017)

What will you do to make amends?

What can you do to make things right again?

Looking at my life that has fallen apart

How on earth can I grant you a brand new start?

The pain you inflicted,

A heart left broken and stricken,

Unless you plead and beg for forgiveness

The bitterness grows in the name of unfinished business.

So here I am, prisoner, to bitter shame,

I suffer from grievous depression and I assign you most the blame.

But what if I can experience true healing,

A wholeness that transcends all feelings?

I don’t possess grace, like God, my Savior,

But with His mercy and strength I seek His favor

In forgiving you without need of amends,

For I, myself, have experienced freedom from God’s forgiveness that has no end. 

Lord, give me healing and let me set them free,

So I will have the freedom to simply be who You created me to be.

Alive in Your presence and washed by Your blood,

Let Your healing and mending descend like a flood.

For holding on to this bitterness has done me no good.

I had to steep deep in Your grace and then I understood,

That forgiveness truly sets the captives free,

So may I willingly extend that grace to others and find healing only found in Thee.

Joy Lynn

God is Good

God is good

On the mountain and in the valley,

In the light and in the shadows,

In the joy and in the pain,

In the sunlight and the pouring rain.

Lord, I struggle with believing this

When all I see is suffering and shame,

But I know and trust Your promises are true

So let this Truth, in my heart, reign.

Joy Lynn

Empty Nest

After countless years of your life invested,

You are suddenly left empty nested.

All your children have up and grown,

They are doing their best to make it on their own.

But your role in their life is not over yet,

You now get to be a safe outlet,

Because life is not always easy outside of the nest,

So they return for advice from those they know best.

So continue to pray your guts out at the foot of the throne,

Pray that your children always know they are not alone,

Because though they are no longer under your control,

A close and personal walk with God was always the ultimate goal.

Well done, good and faithful servant,

Because the faith in which you lived was so fervent,

Though they left the nest, the world is truly blessed,

As they continue to grow and share the faith which they professed. 

Joy Lynn

Continue to Race

So once again I find myself

At the foot of Your throne,

Giving You everything

That I thought I could handle alone.

Though I know Your power,

I’m still independent prone.

I hope that someday soon,

From this I will be outgrown. 

Here’s my heart, Lord,

I lay it down bare.

Rip it apart, Lord,

Leave nothing to spare,

For it's riddled with disease,

It’s caught in a snare,

It’s struggling in life’s waves,

It’s gasping for air. 

Pick it up, Lord,

Breath life anew,

Trapped in these weary bones,

There’s nothing I can do.

Tired of trying to do it on my own,

But that You already knew,

You were simply waiting for my surrender,

Because only You could pull me through.

So until I find my place,

In eternity’s space,

I pray I continually seek You,

Til I see You face to face,

For though the journey is hard now,

You always offer Your embrace,

And though sometimes slow going,

I need to continue to run the race.

 Joy Lynn

Beautifully Free

Please stop and listen,

Repeat after Me,

This ideal dream you have of yourself

Is simply not who I created you to be.

I care not about your makeup 

Or the number on the scale

But I do worry often,

That your confidence is frail.

My beautiful daughter,

Beloved, you are, 

You are created in My image,

You are, in fact, a star…

A star in the way

That light shines from within.

You’ve been illuminating My light

Since the Holy Spirit came in.

So when you look in the mirror,

What do you truly want the world to see?

An altered and carefully manufactured version of you?

Or a life that reflects Me?

The key is that you’re beautiful,

It’s who I created you to be,

Don’t give the idols of comparison control,

Because from these, I've set you free.

Joy Lynn

A Teacher's Prayer (September 30, 2012)

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You, firstly, for being my Teacher,

Being a perfect example of the grace and patience one will need,
To feed Your children with knowledge,
While disciplining to keep the peace.

I do not do my job perfectly,
But every day I pray I’ll be,
A good example to my students,
Of a life consecrated to Thee.

I laugh, I cry, I get frustrated too,
Lord, I simply don’t know how You do what You do.
How do You feel when a child looks in Your eyes and lies to Your face?
Oh, I imagine I’d feel much disgrace…yet You give more grace.

Help me love these students You have entrusted to me.
Help me to point them to You and remind me to bend the knee…
Because I cannot change their hearts, and I cannot give what they need,
But for Your work in their heart and in mine, I humbly plea.

Amen.

Joy Lynn

Confidence

I came in to the conversation desperate, hoping you’d somehow know; I was seeking words of affirmation, some simple words of uncoaxed hope.  But you were quickly on your way and out of the room, not only went your presence, but the little confidence I had left turned to utter gloom. 

Why do I give you so much power, you without a name, because it is not one person but a people, who I look to to save face?  Why is my confidence anchored in what you have to say and why is it shattered when it doesn’t go my way?

Dear God, help me take back the power from insecurity and shame.  Help me to seek You, above any other name.  Let Your hope be my anchor for Your promises are sure.  Let my guilt ridden and self-loathing thoughts diminish as I remember and cling to Your grace, love and mercy that endure. 

Joy Lynn